Absolutely every single person in Africa has their own NGO. And absolutely every single one of those people wants you to hear about their "program".
There is a neighborhood drunk where I work named "Sam". A couple of weeks ago while I was buying a bottle of water, he accosted me with his "program". Everyone with an NGO feels they MUST tell ME about their "program" every time they see me.
The basic tenets of Sam's particular "program" are as follows:
1) To remain drunk at all times;
2) To "do something" for the youth of Kenya/Africa while remaining drunk 24/7;
3) To "do something" for the youth of Kenya/Africa who suffer directly or indirectly from the scourge that is HIV/AIDS while remaining drunk 24/7;
4) To "do something" for the orphans and other vulnerable populations in Kenya/Africa while remaining drunk 24/7;
and
5) For me to finance all of the above, most particularly the portions of these programs that will allow Sam to remain drunk 24/7.
20/01/15: As I am working in the slum of Kayole-Soweto this morning fighting with Excel, this gem of Hollywood's early attempt to help people just like the ones I am trying to help comes blaring out of one of the residents' home. Sorry, but this was too strangely funny and too utterly sick not to share.
This post is dedicated to Dr. Lisa Richey. Check out the book she co-authored with her husband Dr. Stephano Ponte Brand Aid: Shopping Well to Save the World. She researches the effects of celebrity fundraising on international development.
Only in Kenya
Thursday 10:00 a.m. EAT (East Africa Time): So I leave my office to go next door to buy the morning caffeine rush. When I get to the little hole in the wall shop, I see that no one is there to sell my drug of choice. I decide to wait a bit. About 5 minutes later, this guy shows up and stands behind me in line for about 5 minutes, then he opens the cage door, which is unlocked (the cage door is the door that is closed when the store is open and closed. When the store is open the cage is closed to prevent someone from just walking in and stealing the money. When the store is closed, you can do the math.). I assume that the shopkeeper is around the corner for a few minutes. Who knows?
So the dude walks into the store, he looks at me and says "What can I get for you?". So I say I want a coke in a plastic bottle. Then he mentions a price that is about 10 bob higher (that's local lingo for a small number of Kenyan shillings) than I normally pay. So I say "No. Sixty bob" and I give my 60 shillings and go back to work.
Was I on Candid Camera or what?
Today in the news
23.01.15 Heard at 7:30 a.m. local time on Nairobi radio station KISS FM:
The International Criminal Court is an unholy alliance.
Almost as good as dubya's Axis of Evil comment. Maybe the Unholy Alliance will publish a cookbook like the Axis of Evil did.
